What is victim blaming?

(NC) When someone is harmed, is the best first reaction support, or scrutiny? The answer may seem obvious, but many teens and young people have had their experiences met with suspicion or even blame.

As parents, guardians, and trusted adults, we all have a role to play in helping young people understand gender-based violence (GBV) and looking out for signs of it. We can also model how to best respond when these situations are brought to our attention.

How victims or survivors are unjustly scrutinized

GBV can be difficult to identify and report because it’s been so normalized in society. While it’s often thought of as “just physical,” GBV can take many forms, including emotional, sexual and financial. Unfortunately, a common experience for someone coming forward is being blamed for what happened.

This may happen subtly, like scrutinizing what type of clothes they were wearing, their upbringing or their appearance. Victims or survivors may even be blamed for not reporting instances when they were in danger. These behaviours can be perpetuated by media portrayals that judge victims or survivors rather than addressing the harm done. Victim blaming can have the effect of silencing survivors and protecting abusers.

Defining consent

A recent Canadian Women’s Foundation study found that 55 per cent of Canadians don’t fully understand the meaning of sexual consent, which must be:

• Understood by the person giving it
• Given freely and enthusiastically
• Given without threats, manipulation or pressure
• Allowed to be withdrawn at any time

Remember: consent is not compliance which can be born of fear, social pressure and coercion.

How to support victims and survivors

Trusted adults can play an important role by modelling allyship. This can start with something as simple as someone checking their biases and considering how to learn more by opening their perspective. By teaching the young people in your life about consent language and skills, questioning media narratives, making space for open dialogue and challenging victim-blaming biases, adults can make a positive impact in their lives.

These conversations may feel uncomfortable, but unfortunately they’re necessary. Do your part by listening and believing victims and survivors when they share their experiences. Show empathy and avoid blaming or judging them. Starting more discussions and knowing how to recognize and challenge bias is the key to advocating and supporting change.

Learn more, find resources, and support youth by visiting canada.ca/itsnotjust.